Today my boy had a high school tour and meeting with the year level coordinator.
As we toured the school, I felt my breath catching in my throat.
I kept looking at him, seeing how he was reacting with the big school, the talk of the rules etc and he was fine.
Totally chillen 😎.
I kept reminding myself, ok this is a me issue. Not a Seb issue.
As the school went over rules and policies; and of course talked around how some kids need extra intervention as “respect isn’t modelled at home for them”…. I kept wanting to interject.
We heard that so many times when we were struggling with Seb. “He needs more discipline at home”
“we are modelling this at school is this being modelled at a home?”
I remember feeling shame, whereas now I feel anger. It’s not always the home that is the issue. It can definitely be the school environment, children’s nervous systems etc. I know Seb couldn’t have a better example of respect, love and compassion.
At one point the coordinator spoke sternly to him. I was ready to throw hands. 🫣 I sat patiently and thought “ok maybe we aren’t ready for mainstream schooling”
We left and Seb said “I like him, he was nice” I said
“what about how he said this? He got a bit grumpy”
“nah mum sometimes I just need to be told things straight”
The advocate warrior in me is being asked to step down and let Seb lead the way.
Equal parts proud and terrified.